


Louder

by Stereklover11



Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: Alpha Scott, Anal Sex, Angst, Beta Derek, Break Up, Derek Hale is Bad at Feelings, Derek and Stiles will end up together, Emotionally Constipated Derek, Emotionally Hurt Stiles Stilinski, Eventual Happy Ending, Fluff, Human Stiles, Light Bondage, M/M, Playing with Dicks, Post-Season 4, Slow Burn, Smut, Top Derek Hale/Bottom Stiles Stilinski, Virgin Stiles
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-04-21
Updated: 2015-05-14
Packaged: 2018-03-25 03:54:05
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 9
Words: 10,845
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3795739
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Stereklover11/pseuds/Stereklover11
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>After the events in Mexico, Derek and Stiles get together, but only for a short time before Derek breaks up with him.  Stiles doesn't know why Derek is acting the way he is and is super hurt.  Derek is bad at talking about feelings.  Lydia is a fabulous best friend.  Will Derek and Stiles be able to talk about their problems and fix their relationship?</p><p>*</p><p>OR a break-up/make up fic that is inspired by Lea Michele's album "Louder."  Each chapter is named after and inspired by a song off of the album and includes some main lyrics at the end.  I'm sorry if it stresses you out, but I promise it will have a happy ending! :)  I don't own the album "Louder" or anything (including characters, places etc.) from Teen Wolf.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. A Thousand Needles

**Author's Note:**

> I hope you guys enjoy this summer fic I'm writing! :D I promise Derek has a reason for all of this and isn't just being a douche....even if he is douchy sometimes. ;) He's just having some issues. Chapters should be updated often, at most weekly. Ok have fun!

CHAPTER ONE: A THOUSAND NEEDLES

 

Stiles life was good.  After the events in Mexico involving Kate, Peter, and more importantly Derek turning into a full-fledged wolf (and then standing in front of them all naked, Stiles was keen to note), Stiles had realized how important Derek really was to him.  It seems Derek realized that, too, because he broke up with Braeden shortly after discovering Stiles’ feelings for him.  Malia was extremely understanding when Stiles told her about his feelings for Derek, so all was well.

 

“So, what does this make us?” Stiles had asked after their first kiss.

 

“Boyfriends?” Derek had responded, raising an eyebrow.

 

“I’d like that,” Stiles had said, smiling brightly.

 

“I would too,” Derek had said in response, his smile equal to Stiles’ brilliance.

 

Derek was very traditional, in an annoying yet endearing way.  Stiles was still lamenting his virginity at 17 years old, but Derek was firm in his decision to wait until Stiles was 18.  So mostly they just made out.

 

“I’ve already broken so many laws, and I don’t really want ‘had sex with a minor’ added to my list,” Derek had said, brushing his thumb across Stiles’ cheek.  Stiles had rolled his eyes in response to that, but respected Derek’s wishes. Sometimes, Derek would let Stiles run his hands over his bare chest and abs.  Stiles had loved those days.  On other days, Derek wouldn’t even let Stiles touch him. He had claimed to be too horny on those days and didn’t want to risk anything.  Stiles would just laugh.

 

Of course, all good things come to an end, especially in Stiles’ life.  It seems like he can’t hold on to one good thing for too long.  Derek broke up with Stiles two weeks before he turned 18. Stiles remembers with exactness the cold look in Derek’s icy blue-green eyes when he told him that he didn’t want to be with him anymore.  He remembers the original shock, followed by horrifying sadness that eventually ended in anger. Why did he do it? Why did Derek waste both of their time? One of the things that sucked the most was that it was just TWO WEEKS BEFORE STILES’ 18 BIRTHDAY. He had been planning to spend the night with Derek.  He wasn’t only dating Derek to have sex with him.  He wanted Derek to be his first time because he loved him.  Clearly, (and Stiles thought it should have been obvious) Derek didn’t feel the same way.

 

Pack meetings became a little awkward after that. Scott told Stiles that he could almost feel the actual tension between Stiles and Derek, who would sit on opposite sides of the room.  Derek refused to look at Stiles when he wasn’t talking to him, and he didn’t talk to him very often.  Whenever he did, it was usually with one of the most poisonous tones that Stiles had ever heard. He had no idea what he had done to deserve this treatment and had to work hard to fight back tears whenever Derek would speak to him.  Lydia often sat next to Stiles at pack meetings and would soothingly rub his arm with her fingertips.  Stiles was grateful for her friendship now more than ever. 

 

The worst part about all of this was that Stiles would still catch himself staring at Derek.  Staring at the way his bicep flexed when he would cross his arms, staring at the hand that would scratch at his beard (and drinking in the sound that would make), staring at his perfect ass when he would walk away, and staring at his beautiful face whenever he could.  Yes, the hardest part was that Stiles was still in love with Derek Hale. Even though Derek hated him for some unknown reason.  It felt like his heart was being punctured repeatedly, over and over again until it bled dry and would fill up again over night just to repeat the process.

 

Stiles didn’t dare ask Derek why he broke up with him. Even though the curiosity was killing him, he kind of didn’t want to know.  Not to mention he was totally afraid to bring the subject up. Nowadays, they only talked about things dealing with the mission at hand, or the new menace terrorizing Beacon Hills. 

 

“I think you should talk to him,” Lydia said seriously one day.

 

“Who?  What?” Stiles asked, breaking out of his own thoughts.

 

“Derek.  You should talk to Derek,” Lydia said with a little impatience.

 

“About what?” Stiles asked, raising an eyebrow.

 

“About you guys!” Lydia said, “You can just go on ignoring this forever, Stiles.”

 

“I can’t do it Lyds,” Stiles said looking away, “You should make Scott do it.  He’s the Alpha and Derek respects him.”

 

“You know Scott has already tried to talk to him about it. He said it was for personal reasons,” Lydia explained. 

 

“Well, if that’s the case then he definitely won’t want to talk to me about it!” Stiles said angrily.  Lydia didn’t say anything.

 

“I’m sorry,” Stiles said sighing, “It’s just really hard, ok?”

 

“I know,” Lydia said, giving her best friend a hug.

 

Stiles went home that night from Lydia’s with a heavy heart.  His heart always felt heavy these days so he thought nothing of it.  The only thing he thought of on his lonely drive home was the feeling of Derek’s hand in his and the feeling of having Derek love him, only to have it all ripped away.

 

 

_Oh why do you wanna break away?_

_I’m bleeding_

_I can see you now in shades of gray_

_A memory fading._


	2. Cue The Rain

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Derek and Stiles have a very unproductive discussion at a pack meeting.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have a lot more time to write so here's chapter 2! I just want to point out that the lyrics at the end of some of these chapters don't necessarily apply to just Stiles. ;)

CHAPTER 2: CUE THE RAIN

 

Stiles rolled over in his bed, burying his face into the warmth of Derek’s neck.

 

“Good morning sleepyhead,” Derek mumbled into Stiles’ hair, pressing a kiss to his forehead.

 

“Hmmm, morning,” Stiles said sleepily. He took in the smell of Derek’s t-shirt, which still smelled like his natural, delicious, musky scent. He didn’t even realize he was hard until he felt himself rub up against Derek’s thigh.  He could feel Derek freeze against him.

 

“What’s wrong?” Stiles asked, looking up into Derek’s eyes.  They were empty and not…right.

 

“Derek?” Stiles asked reaching up to touch his face. When his hand came in contact with Derek’s skin he felt nothing.  Suddenly he was falling down endlessly though a large black hole, and Derek was up at the top glaring down at him.  He tried to scream but no sound came out.  When he was finally about to hit the surface below, he jolted up in his bed, finally awake from the nightmare.  Tears were streaming down his face almost as hard as the rain pouring outside of his window.

 

*   *   *

 

“Dude, that’s creepy,” Scott helpfully supplied when Stiles had told him about his nightmare the previous night. The rain was still falling down in buckets as they made their way to Derek’s loft for their pack meeting. Derek’s was the easiest and quickest place for everyone to get so they had it there. 

 

“Yes, Scott,” Stiles said rolling his eyes, “Not to mention it made me feel completely miserable to wake up without him there.”

 

“I’m sorry, man,” Scott said nudging Stiles with his shoulder, “I really don’t know what to you tell you besides what I already have.”

 

“I know.  And I think I’m going to try to talk to him today,” Stiles said, taking a deep breath.

 

“Really?!” Scott basically yelled in surprise.

 

“Yeah.  After that dream, I just need to know _why_ he isn’t there anymore.  I want to know what I did,” Stiles said.

 

“Well that’s what I don’t get…you didn’t really do anything,” Scott said, pulling his eyebrows together. It was honestly kind of adorable, his face getting all scrunched up like that when he tried to concentrate or think too hard. 

 

“Yeah…” Stiles said trailing off. He didn’t really want to talk about it anymore.  He already felt nervous enough with the prospect of facing the big bad wolf to talk about feelings.

 

When they finally arrived at Derek’s loft, Lydia, Malia, Kira, and Liam were already there waiting for them. Derek nodded in their direction with his typical scowl reserved for only Stiles on his face. Stiles just gulped. He could feel his heart beating loudly in his chest.  Apparently Derek noticed too because his eyes moved in Stiles’ direction and his eyebrows pulled together, causing his scowl to become even more intense.  But before anything could happen, he turned and sat down next to Malia on the couch. 

 

“'Kay guys, we need to talk about the weird-ass witches that have been leaking into Beacon Hills,” Scott started, the ever-dutiful alpha, “They’ve been casting some crazy enchantments on the place, so we need to take them out.”

 

“We could probably just send the human chatterbox. They wouldn’t be able to get an incantation out with him talking their faces off,” Derek said, avoiding Stiles’ gaze.

 

“Enough, Derek,” Scott growled. Derek just sat further back in his seat and crossed his arms even tighter if that was possible. Stiles could feel the heat behind his eyes as they stung with threatening tears.  He looked down at his hands and started twiddling his thumbs to distract himself.

 

“Seriously guys…we’re gonna have to go out and stop these things,” Scott said returning his gaze to his pack.

 

“We could try a diversion,” Stiles said quietly, ignoring the way Derek rolled his eyes.

 

“I think Stiles is right,” Lydia said, speaking for the first time, “He’s always right.”

 

“Yeah and he always manages to get himself in trouble, too,” Derek growled.

 

“Derek, can you please shut the hell up?!” Scott yelled, eyes flashing red.  Derek looked furious, but didn’t say anything more.

 

“No, maybe Derek’s right Scott,” Stiles said sarcastically, “Maybe I should always stay with the strongest, which besides you, would be him.”

 

Derek looked horrified.  Stiles couldn’t help the small smirk that started to pull at the corners of his mouth.

 

“Ok can we _please_ move past Stiles and Derek’s bullshit and get something accomplished?” Malia asked impatiently.

 

“Sounds good to me,” Scott grumbled.

 

After some debate, the pack decided that they would follow Stiles’ suggestion of trying to distract the witches and then attack them. Stiles knew they would pick his plan; that’s what he was usually there for.  After the meeting was over, Stiles tried to swallow down his nerves as he made his way towards Derek.

 

“Ummm…could I talk to you for a second?” Stiles asked quietly.  Derek grunted in response, so Stiles took that as a yes and turned to start walking into the kitchen. He could hear Derek following him, every footstep a dull thud on the floor.  Stiles turned around on the spot when they finally made it into the kitchen.  Derek was glaring, as usual.  He supposed he shouldn’t have expected anything else.

 

“So…” Stiles started.  That was the problem: he didn’t really know where to start.

 

“So what?” Derek supplied unhelpfully.

 

“Derek, I’m sorry.  I have no idea what I did to make you hate me so much, but I’m sorry,” Stiles blurted out.  Derek’s face didn’t change at all.

 

“You didn’t do anything,” Derek said.

 

“Then why are you acting this way?!” Stiles yelled, his hands flailing awkwardly as he motioned towards Derek.

 

Derek remained still and cold like a statue.

 

“I loved you Derek!  I would have done anything for you, I would have _died_ for you!” Stiles couldn’t hold back the tears now. Suddenly Derek got too close to Stiles’ face, his glare still in place, only now it looked slightly feral.

 

“ _Don’t ever say that again,_ ” he whispered menacingly.  That was too much for Stiles.  With a sob he ran from the kitchen and from the apartment altogether.

 

“Stiles..?” Scott called out, but Stiles didn’t care. He needed to get the hell out of there. He ran down the stairs and through the door into the cold rain.  He let himself fall to his knees as he sobbed into his hands.  He didn’t even care that the rain was soaking him through.

 

“Stiles?” came Scott’s voice again.

 

“I hate him Scott!  I legitimately hate him!” Stiles yelled out in frustration.

 

“What happened?” Scott asked, trying to pull his friend out of the rain.

 

“He’s just being such an asshole, and for no reason!” Stiles said. 

 

“I think there’s a little more going on than we know,” Scott said quietly.

 

“I don’t care.  I don’t want to know what stupid-ass problems he has,” Stiles said angrily. And with that, he walked towards his jeep and slammed the door shut as he climbed in.  Scott watched him drive away.  Unbeknownst to either of them, Derek watched too from his window.

 

_It’s hard to remember what we left behind_

_But your hand in mine is hard to erase…_

_The city was on fire for us we would have died for us_

_Up in flames.  Cue the rain._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for all the angst haha. This chapter is kind of a breaking point that moves the story along though. Thanks for reading!


	3. Cannonball

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lydia takes Stiles out to the club.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here's chapter 3!!! Enjoy!!

CHAPTER 3: CANNONBALL

 

Stiles spent the next few days at home for the most part.  He tried to focus on researching witches and thinking of a way that the pack could ambush them. Lydia had been spending most of her time with him trying to help him.  They searched in millions of books it had seemed like.  Stiles groaned as he dragged a particularly heavy volume towards himself.

 

“Lydia, I swear we have looked EVERYWHERE and we still haven’t found anything,” he said, running his hand through his hair.

 

“Well, I don’t know what you want me to do, Stiles,” Lydia sassed.  Stiles dropped his head into the crook of his elbow.

 

“Take me out somewhere,” he said against his elbow, his voice all muffled.

 

“Sorry, that language is not one of the eight that I speak,” Lydia responded, causing Stiles to huff out a laugh.

 

“Let’s go to Jungle!” he said, getting excited, “I really need to, you know, get myself out there.”

 

“But Stiles, we haven’t made any progress-“ Lydia started.

 

“Lyds, we have been in here for THREE DAYS. I need to get out,” Stiles complained.

 

“Ok, ok, fine!” Lydia said, holding up her hands, “I’ll take you to Jungle.” 

 

“Yesssssss!” Stiles said, fist pumping the air and proceeding to trip on a book.

 

“That is, if we make it alive,” Lydia said, rolling her eyes.

 

Stiles put on the tightest black jeans that he had with a maroon colored V-neck t-shirt.  Basically, he felt amazing.  Tonight was going to be a night to have fun. Lydia pulled up to Jungle and parked in the lot across the street.  Stiles could already feel the beat of the music pumping inside as it echoed through the open doors. 

 

“Just promise me you won’t run off with some random guy tonight,” Lydia said.

 

“Promise,” Stiles said, “Unless he’s totally worth it.”

 

“Stiles, you can’t know if someone’s worth it just from a first meeting in a club,” Lydia protested.

 

“Says the girl who sleeps with guys on the first date,” Stiles said teasingly.

 

“I do not!” Lydia said, her mouth opening an a “O” of mock horror, “Well, at least not all the time.”

 

Stiles laughed and Lydia’s cheeks turned pink.

 

“Oh whatever!” she said, hitting him on the arm, “Let’s just go in!”

 

They walked inside, the music was blaring way too loud, it smelled like sweat, but it was just what Stiles needed. Several pairs of eyes followed him as he walked in, taking in the tight shirt and jeans.

 

“Oh God,” Lydia said laughing, “You’d think Zac Efron just walked in.”

 

“Hey!  I _am_ Zac Efron hot!” Stiles said. He looked around, taking in all the faces and then stopped dead.

 

“Oh shit,” he said.  Lydia almost bumped into him.

 

“What’s wrong?” she asked.  Stiles pointed towards a corner where none other than Derek Hale was sitting by himself, drinking something that he couldn’t even get drunk on. Stiles considered turning around and leaving, but it was too late; Derek already made eye contact with him and Lydia. Stiles could see his face pale considerably.

 

“Well this is awkward,” Stiles said, scratching the back of his neck.

 

“Well come on, we can’t just stand here now that he’s seen us,” Lydia said, dragging Stiles by the hand.

 

“Uhh, where are we going, Lyds?” Stiles asked, panic building in his voice.

 

“We have to say hi, he’s already seen us!” Lydia said indignantly.

 

“What the hell-“ Stiles started to say.

 

“Hey Derek!” Lydia shouted out.

 

“Hey Lydia.  Stiles,” Derek said nodding.

 

“What are _you_ doing here?” Stiles asked with a decent amount of venom in his voice. Derek looked taken aback by the hostility but quickly regained control of his features.  That secretly made Stiles leap for joy inside.

 

“Why do you care?” Derek asked.

 

“Well usually the broody, I-never-have-fun Sourwolf doesn’t do shit like this,” Stiles said gesturing around himself. He felt Lydia step on his foot, but he didn’t pay her any attention.  Derek scowled.

 

“Whatever Stiles,” was his response.

 

“Well, I’m gonna go dance with some super hot men, so I’ll talk to you two later.  Or at least, I’ll talk to _you_ , Lydia, later,” Stiles said, letting Lydia slide into the bench opposite Derek in the booth. Then he took off into the crowd. There were plenty of guys willing to grind up against him, and some gutsy ones even squeezed his ass. Normally, Stiles wouldn’t allow such behavior, but tonight he really didn’t give a damn. He was so sick of research, and even sicker of Derek.  Speaking of whom, Stiles shot a couple of glances Derek’s way only to catch him staring. He would look away every time, pretending that he hadn’t been caught.  Stiles smirked to himself.  When he had finally had enough, he slinked back over to Lydia and Derek. Derek refused to acknowledge him.

 

“K, Lyds, I think I’m ready to go,” Stiles said.

 

“Ok, see you Derek,” Lydia said, standing up and taking Stiles’ arm.  They quickly made their way out of the club, and once they were outside Stiles couldn’t stop his babbling.

 

“Did you see how he was staring at me the whole time?!” Stiles said, talking fast, “He couldn’t take his eyes off me, the loser!”

 

“Yes Stiles,” Lydia said patiently, rolling her eyes.

 

“Seriously, I don’t understand what that douchebag wants.  One day he basically tells me he hates me, and then the next he can’t take his eyes off of my tightly-clothed ass,” Stiles ranted gleefully, “I seriously hate that guy.”

 

“From what it sounds like, I don’t think you hate him at all,” Lydia said.

 

“What are you talking about??” Stiles asked, looking shocked.

 

“Stiles, you’ve talked about only him since we left those doors,” Lydia pointed out.

 

“So?  I’m.. I’m venting!” Stiles said defensively.  Lydia just gave him a look that clearly said ‘really?’ Stiles huffed out a breath.

 

“He drives me nuts,” Stiles said defiantly.

 

“Oh, I don’t doubt that,” Lydia said under her breath.

 

_But I won’t hide inside I’ve gotta get out._

_Lonely inside and light the fuse_

_Light it now._

_And now I will start living today_

_I close the door._

_I got this new beginning and I’ll fly like a cannonball._

 


	4. Battlefield

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The pack hunts down the witches that are terrorizing Beacon Hills.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry I haven't posted in a while friends! I have been EXTREMELY distracted haha...by a boy. Of course, it isn't really working out which kind of sucks, so that kind of threw me off of the whole writing thing. I hope you enjoy this chapter! It's not the best of the story, and hopefully we'll be seeing a little more into Derek's feelings coming up.

CHAPTER 4: BATTLEFIELD

 

Stiles finally found something. In some of his reading, he had discovered that a witch’s power was weaker when it was separated from others of its group.  Kind of like werewolves, he thought dryly.  They knew that there were four witches in the area.  All they needed to do was split up so that they could distract them individually and then they should be able to take them out. 

 

“This might just be what we need,” Scott said, going over Stiles’ notes at the next pack meeting, “Except there are four of them and seven of us…that’s not even two per witch.  And two of us are more human than not.”

 

“Hey!” Lydia said, “I am completely able to take care of myself.”

 

“Yeah she can scream at them,” Liam joked, receiving a formidable glare from Lydia.

 

“No, it’s fine, just put Lydia with Derek and me with Malia and Liam,” Stiles said, “You’ll go with Kira obviously, and then we can all come together for the last one.”

 

Scott looked like he was thinking too hard.

 

“Yeah, I guess we’ll have to do that,” he said.

 

“There aren’t really any other options as far as I can see,” Derek said.  Stiles pointedly started playing with his phone, “Stiles is right.”

 

Stiles’ phone fell to the ground.

 

“Uhhmmm…what?” Stiles said, hastily picking it up.

 

“I said you’re right,” Derek said, without any kind of inflection in his voice.

 

“Since when do you ever think anything I do is right?” he hissed venomously.  Stiles swore he saw a flash of hurt in Derek’s eyes.

 

“Dear God, can you two just STOP,” Scott said, “The hostility isn’t helping anything!  If you would just put away the daggers, we might actually accomplish something here.”

 

Derek glanced down at his hands that were folded in his lap, and Stiles just kept playing with his phone.  Lydia let out a sigh and started twirling her hair.

 

“Ok, let’s do it this afternoon,” Scott said.

 

*   *   *

 

Stiles was grumbling as he drove Malia and Liam to the preserve in his Jeep.  Scott and Kira were driving in front of him in her car, and Derek and Lydia were behind him.  His eyes kept darting to his mirrors to check out the sleek, black Camaro.  He mentally kicked himself in the shin every time he did. When they finally all arrived, Stiles stumbled out of his Jeep with his trusty bat in hand. Derek looked over at it once as he gracefully got out of his beautiful car.  Stupid werewolves, Stiles thought to himself.

 

“Ok, we all know our responsibilities,” Scott announced, “Everyone find your witch and kill it, and then we’ll meet up to take the last one.”

 

It didn’t take long for Stiles, Malia, and Liam to find one.  She was certainly not happy to see them.  Stiles marveled at her hideous appearance. She didn’t even look human. Her skin was grayish colored and scabbed; her body was unbelievably thin and deformed.  Her eyes were completely white and lifeless, and they stuck out from the sockets slightly.  She screeched when she saw them and tried to cast some complex spell, but Malia and Liam were on her before she could finish.  They quickly and easily ripped her to shreds, her frail body easily tearing apart. Stiles wanted to vomit.

 

After dispatching the witch they started running through the woods to find the others.  The only sound they could hear was the crunching of the leaves under their feet. For some reason, Stiles felt a little unnerved.  His mind went to Derek briefly before he quickly pushed those thoughts away.  He wasn’t paying attention, and he ran into something solid. And warm.  And muscular, he realized, as he grabbed onto two powerful biceps to support himself.  As he raised his head, he found himself looking into Derek’s beautiful green eyes.

 

 

“Uhh, sorry,” Stiles said, hastily pulling himself away from Derek.  Derek didn’t respond, he only looked completely emotionless.  He almost looked like he didn’t know what to say.

 

“We should probably find Scott,” Derek said, breaking the awkward silence.

 

“I think we should just find the other witch. They’re not that hard to kill,” Stiles said, “We could totally take her.”

 

“That wasn’t the plan, though,” Derek said. Stiles could tell he was trying to be calm and patient.

 

“It’s fine Der-“ Stiles stopped. There was a sound to their left. The three wolves’ eyes flashed as they turned their attention to the spot where the sound came from. Lydia moved back; she looked extremely distressed, which Stiles knew wasn’t a good sign.

 

“Scott and Kira?” Stiles whispered to her. She shook her head in a “no.” Stiles turned his attention back to the spot the wolves were focusing on.  All of a sudden, the witch stepped out from behind a tree. She looked different than the one Stiles, Malia, and Liam had seen.  She was taller, and her eyes were black.  She had a strange amulet around her neck.  She must be the leader, Stiles thought.  Her breath was ragged as if she couldn’t breath.  Derek growled menacingly at her.  She stopped and took him in, then let out a wheezy laugh.

 

“Foolish…foolish wolf,” she wheezed. It sounded like she just ran a marathon and had incredible difficulty talking, “You stand there…so bold…But your…your _heart_ is beyond repair.”

 

Derek froze.  The witch cackled.

 

“I…I can end it…” the witch said, “Love is…wasteful. See…what a broken… _heart_ …does for you?”

 

She gestured towards herself. Stiles moved towards her. Her gaze shifted to him.

 

“Ahhhh,” she weezed out, “So…pure…unlike your lover…your _heart_ …would be delicious..”

 

Lydia screamed.  The witch dived for Stiles, who raised his bat to defend himself. He felt her as she rammed into him; she was stronger than she appeared.  He heard Derek roar and then the witch’s weight was gone. Stiles looked up to see that Derek had ripped her off of him and threw her into a tree.  She fell to the ground, her laugh bubbling and wheezing as dark liquid dripped from her mouth.

 

“You can’t ever…be happy,” she said looking at Derek, “A dark… _heart_ …remains dark…forever.”

 

Suddenly they heard the roar of their alpha. Scott and Kira ran into view, both of their eyes glowing ferociously.  Kira had her sword in hand.  The witch’s smile faded and was replaced by an ugly grimace.  She muttered something under breath.  Her voice grew louder and before anyone had time to do anything, a giant bubble of energy formed around her pushing them all back.  When the energy vanished, she was gone.

 

“You should have waited for me,” Scott growled, his eyes fading back to normal.

 

“Stiles didn’t want to wait,” Derek said brushing himself off.  He looked…bad.

 

“Thank you.  For pulling her off me,” Stiles said looking at his feet.

 

“Don’t mention it,” Derek said walking away.

 

Stiles looked up as he walked away. He couldn’t take his eyes off him. Shit.  His anger towards him was very short-lived. Derek Hale was the most annoying, infuriating, sexiest thing he had ever seen.  And yup, he still loved him.

 

_“Eye to eye we face our fears_

_unarmed on the battlefield._

_We seemed like a good idea.”_


	5. On My Way

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Stiles goes to Derek for help on finding the remaining witch.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> New chapter! Derek is starting to soften up a little, maybe? :)

CHAPTER FIVE: ON MY WAY

 

He really shouldn’t be doing this. He had no idea what was possessing him to drive his little Jeep towards Derek’s loft.  Stiles glared at the rain that was pattering against his windshield as he pulled up next to Derek’s building.  As soon as he stopped the car, it was as though he could think clearly again. What the hell was he doing? Derek didn’t want to see him. Besides, he had research to do. They still had to find the leader of the witch clan, and Stiles was usually in charge of things like that. He didn’t have time to be wasting on Derek and his moody ass.  Even though all of the above was true, he just couldn’t stop his feet from moving as he got out of his Jeep and ran through the rain towards the door. As soon as he was inside, he pulled off the hood of his red hoodie and pushed the button on the elevator. He tapped his foot impatiently. The annoying thing was that Derek would know that he was here way before he actually knocked on his door. He might even already know that he was there.  Stupid werewolf senses, Stiles thought to himself, kicking the wall impatiently. Typically, he managed to bang his big toe pretty hard.  Cursing silently, he slid into the elevator as the doors opened. 

 

As he had assumed would be the case, Derek was already waiting for him with the usual scowl when the elevators doors slid open on his floor.

 

“What are you doing here?” he asked.

 

“I need help with my research,” Stiles said truthfully.

 

“Why didn’t you just ask Lydia to help you?” Derek shot at him.

 

“I…I don’t know,” Stiles admitted. He didn’t have a good response to that, and he didn’t feel like lying and making everything worse. Not to mention that Derek would hear the lie.  Once again, stupid werewolf senses.

 

Derek sighed, “I really don’t think it’s a good idea for us to be alone.”

 

“Why not?” Stiles asked, walking up and getting too close to Derek.  He didn’t even flinch. He did, however, turn around and walk into his loft.  Stiles’ breath left his lungs with Derek, and he almost whimpered at the loss of closeness. Why was he all of a sudden dying to have him again?

 

“Well are you coming in?  Not that I really want you to…” Derek said when Stiles didn’t move.

 

“You didn’t answer my question,” Stiles said, slipping into the loft.

 

“Well, there’s always the risk of me ripping your throat out with my teeth when you drive me insane,” Derek said dryly.

 

“Why do I drive you insane?” Stiles asked, raising an eyebrow.

 

“Stiles, please, I do not feel like talking about this,” Derek said.

 

“When though, Derek?  When will you finally talk to me?” Stiles practically begged.

 

“Why do you care?  Don’t you hate me now?” Derek asked.  It hurt Stiles to hear the tiny bit of hope in Derek’s voice.

 

“I don’t hate you,” Stiles said quietly, “I never have and I never will.”

 

“I heard you yell it to Scott the other day in the rain,” Derek said, “that you hated me.”

 

“Well, I was angry, sure,” Stiles said, “But I didn’t actually _hate_ you.”

 

“Whatever,” Derek sighed, “Let’s get started. The sooner we start, the sooner we’re done.”

 

Stiles felt like his head was telling him that he should just leave.  But something stronger made him walk over and sit on the couch.  Derek sat down on the other end and looked at Stiles expectantly.

 

“So?  What do you need help with?” Derek asked.

 

“I…I just don’t know what to do!” Stiles exclaimed, feeling a lump in his throat.  Oh shit, not now, he thought to himself.  Right now was not a good time to cry.  But he couldn’t get a hold on all of the stress bubbling up inside of him with the witch and Derek.

 

“I just can’t figure out everything, you know? I’m not perfect,” Stiles said, feeling a single tear fall down his cheek.

 

Derek didn’t say anything.  Nor did he move.  His face was a hard mask that watched as Stiles suffered.

 

“I just…need a hug,” Stiles said between tears, “From you.”

 

Derek still didn’t move or speak.

 

“Can you just not be an ass for, like, one second?” Stiles asked?

 

“Stiles, I–” Derek started, but he couldn’t finish as Stiles threw himself across the couch and wrapped his arms around Derek’s middle. He let his tears fall freely, not caring that he was getting Derek’s shirt all wet.  He deserved it anyway.

 

“Stiles, please stop,” Derek whispered. Stiles didn’t listen, but Derek didn’t push him away either.  Eventually Stiles sat up, and he quickly recomposed himself.  He cleared his throat loudly and scooted back from Derek a little bit.

 

“Uhh, I’m sorry, I just…I’ve just been under a lot of stress,” Stiles said.  His voice was thick and gravelly.  Derek hadn’t moved at all, but he looked a little frightened.  Stiles would have laughed if he didn’t feel like shit.

 

“It’s for reasons like that that we should never be alone,” Derek said quietly.  Stiles didn’t know how to respond.  Luckily, Derek moved on quickly to the next subject.

 

“So what are you having trouble with?” he asked.

 

“I have no idea where to start looking for her!” Stiles said, “The only thing that I found is that a single witch will sometimes gravitate to a place filled with negative energy. Where are we going to find one of those? The Nemeton?  I just don’t know…”

 

Derek’s eyebrows met in the middle as they furrowed in a frown.  “Maybe we could check my family’s house?  There’s certainly a lot of negative energy there.  Probably the most in Beacon Hills.”

 

“I didn’t think of that…” Stiles said.

 

“We’ll tell Scott at our pack meeting tomorrow, and then maybe we can go check it out,” Derek said, “But for now, I really think you should leave.”

 

“Yeah…you’re probably right,” Stiles muttered. He got up and grabbed his hoodie, sliding it on.  He moved towards the door, and Derek didn’t follow.

 

“See you,” Stiles said. 

 

“Yeah,” Derek grunted in reply.

 

Stiles made his way back to his Jeep. He still didn’t know why he did this. The last thing he needed was for Derek to see him broken and at his most delicate.  He knew that if Derek ever came around and tried to make things better that he couldn’t just let him back in, even though he wanted to. He would have to prove himself. But Stiles tried not to dwell on such thoughts – it probably would never happen anyway.

 

_And my heart’s too drunk to drive_

_I should stay away from you tonight._

_But in this blackout state of mind_

_Baby all I want is you tonight._

_When my head tells me no, my heart tells me go_

_So I’m hitting the road tonight._


	6. Don't Let Go

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lydia helps Stiles come up with a plan...and does a lot of strawberry blonde scheming. ;)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sooo this was fun to write haha. Lydia is such a queen. I hope the story is living up to what people want it to be!

CHAPTER 6: DON’T LET GO

 

“Welp,” Stiles said, while Lydia was busy taking selfies on her phone, “I went to Derek’s.”

 

Lydia dropped her phone, which was weird because she was usually super graceful.

 

“WHAT?!” she yelled in shock.

 

“I went to Derek’s to get some help with the witch problem,” Stiles said calmly.

 

“What happened?!” Lydia asked. She looked horrified.

 

“He wasn’t as much of an asshole as usual. He still kinda was, though” Stiles said biting his lip like he was thinking hard, “I think he’s getting soft.”

 

“Did…did anything bad happen though?” Lydia asked, coming down from the shock.

 

“Not really…I mean I cried and then he let me hug him,” Stiles said nonchalantly.

 

Lydia’s eyes popped.  Then she grinned all big and scarily.

 

“What?” Stiles asked.

 

“Here’s the thing, Stiles.  It’s _totally_ obvious that Derek still cares about you.  Something is just…wrong,” she said.

 

“I have no idea what you’re talking about,” Stiles said.

 

Lydia rolled her eyes.  “I see the way he looks at you when you’re not watching, Stiles! It’s like he’s hurting, or something. He longs for you, I can tell.”

 

“Well then what the holy HELL?!” Stiles yelled, “He could have had me if he wanted me!”

 

“I feel like there’s something that we’re missing,” Lydia said, “He’s had a really hard life after all…maybe he’s just been so damaged by things that he’s become a masochist.” 

 

“Lydia, that’s ridiculous,” Stiles scoffed.

 

“No it’s not, Stiles!” she said. Then her face changed drastically. Her smile looked pure evil.

 

“What now?!” Stiles groaned.

 

“Wanna try an experiment?” she said in a low voice. As if someone could hear them.

 

“Ummm, you mean like science?” Stiles asked.

 

“No, I mean like you and I pretending to be a thing to see how Derek reacts!” Lydia said, almost shrieking with excitement.

 

“Lydia, are you serious right now?” Stiles said, “I mean, sure I would’ve jumped on that opportunity just a year ago, but don’t you think he’ll see right through it?”

 

“I don’t think he will.  He knows how much you liked me,” she said grinning. Stiles let out a long sigh.

 

“Alright, I guess we can try it…” he said reluctantly. Lydia jumped for joy. Totally out of character, Stiles thought.

 

*   *   *

 

They put their plan into action at the next pack meeting.  They notified everyone else so that they would be in on it.  They didn’t need everyone else freaking out and then have to lie to an entire pack of werewolves. Scott basically jumped out of his pants with excitement.  He thought it was hilarious; Stiles still thought it was stupid.  But Lydia would not be swayed, so they walked into Derek’s loft hand in hand. Derek’s eyes about popped out of their sockets.

 

“What the _hell_ is that?” Stiles heard him whisper to Malia.  He couldn’t help the small grin that spread on his face.

 

“Didn’t you know?  They got together last night,” Malia whispered back into Derek’s ear.

 

“Wait…like, together together? Meaning, they had sex?” Derek asked, trying to be casual about it.

 

“I certainly did not ask, and I suggest you don’t either,” Malia said.

 

Lydia and Stiles sat down in the loveseat, and Lydia ran her hands all over Stiles: through his hair, across his shoulder. She even ran her hand up his thigh as she kissed his cheek.  She glanced over at Derek, who was watching as though he was trying to pretend like he wasn’t in excruciating pain.  She grinned and then nibbled on Stiles ear, making Stiles gasp out loud.

 

“Is this really appropriate?!” Derek said to Scott, gesturing toward Stiles and Lydia.

 

“It’s fine Derek,” Scott said dismissively. Derek let out a huff of outrage. Scott notified the rest of the pack about Derek and Stiles’ idea of searching Derek’s old house for the witch. They would go the next day. The meeting was short and simple. After Scott had finished, Lydia got up and followed Derek into the kitchen.

 

“Derek, I need to speak with you,” she said sweetly.

 

“What do you want?” he asked without turning around to look at her.  She, however, marched right up to him, turned him around to face her, and pushed him up against the wall.

 

“What the hell–” he said in shock.

 

“You’re still in love with Stiles, aren’t you?” Lydia asked, looking closely into his eyes.

 

“What are you talking about?” Derek asked weakly.

 

“Don’t try and play that game with me. I know everything,” she said with a flip of her hair, “Now admit it.  You’re still in love with him.”

 

Derek looked like he was going to be sick.

 

“Yes,” he whimpered.  Lydia felt the triumphant look on her face as Derek saw it for himself. 

 

“Then may I ask what the _hell_ your problem is?” Lydia said, dropping her smile. Derek looked like this was the last conversation he wanted to have.

 

“I just can’t do it, Lydia!” he finally said, giving in, “He reminds me of…he’s just too innocent and too good…too perfect.”

 

“Why is that blocking you?” Lydia asked impatiently.

 

“Because I’m not any of those things,” Derek whispered, “And people like that who come into my life get hurt. They die, Lydia.”

 

“Well for the record, Stiles does think you are all those things.  Or…at least he used to, until you totally ruined yourself for him,” she said with a touch of venom. He deserved it, she thought, justifying herself.

 

“He hates me, doesn’t he?” Derek asked, looking absolutely horrified.  Lydia rolled her eyes.

 

“He doesn’t hate you.  If he did, it would be your own fault anyway. But you better think of some damn awesome way to win him back and explain your behavior because don’t you think for one second that I will allow him to go back out with you if you don’t,” she said furiously.

 

Derek gulped.

 

“And if you don’t try to pursue him, I will personally murder you,” she finished, letting go of his shirt. She turned and started to strut out of the kitchen.

 

“So…you two aren’t together then?” Derek asked behind her.  She smiled and turned around.

 

“He’s still a virgin, darling,” she said. Derek blushed bright red.

 

“That’s not what I was…I wasn’t asking to know if…” he couldn’t finish.

 

“Bye, Derek,” Lydia said giving him a little wave.

 

*   *   *

 

“You are legitimately crazy,” Stiles said.

 

“You’re welcome,” Lydia said sarcastically, “If it wasn’t for me, he would still be an idiot.”

 

“He’ll always be an idiot,” Stiles muttered. Lydia contemplated this.

 

“You’re probably right,” she said. They both burst into laughter.

 

“So, what now?” Stiles asked.

 

“Now you have to be the toughest bitch around. Make him work for it, Stiles. You can’t just let him back in after everything that he did,” Lydia said.

 

“I wasn’t planning on it,” Stiles said, “In fact, I’m mad at myself for still liking him after everything.”

 

“It’s okay that you do,” Lydia reassured him, “You just have to learn to trust him again.  It’ll just take time, but give him that time to make it right.”

 

Stiles nodded.  He didn’t want to be the helpless needy type.  He smiled to himself, ready to let Derek have the craziest ride of his life…after all, Stiles Stilinski does crazy so well. 

 

_Shadows above the sand,_

_I waited so long to hold your hand._

_Falling in love, helpless_

_Just fighting stupid like kids._


	7. Burn With You

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Derek starts to try to win Stiles back. The pack puts their plan to kill the last witch in action.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I've been having more time to write, so here's the next chapter! :D Enjoy!

CHAPTER 7: BURN WITH YOU

 

The pack was getting ready the next morning at Derek’s loft to confront the final witch.  Or at least, that’s what they hoped for.  They planned to leave a 9 to go to Derek’s old family house. Stiles felt sure that she would be hiding there, sucking up all the negative energy that had built up over the years.  As he was getting a back pack put together with food and other necessary items, Derek came up behind him.

 

“Um, Stiles?  Could I talk to you for a second?” Derek asked, sounding almost shy.

 

“Now’s not really a good time, Derek,” Stiles said, making sure his voice sounded just a little irritable. 

 

“Yeah, ok, sorry,” Derek said, backing away. Stiles smiled to himself. Stiles – 1, Derek – 0. Ok more like Derek – 1 million but whatever.

 

Stiles finally got the pack together and walked over to Scott.

 

“Everything’s ready, boss,” he said.

 

“Great,” Scott said.  He sounded preoccupied.  “Do you have your bat?”

 

“Yup, right here,” Stiles said, holding it up.

 

“Wait, one more thing,” Derek said walking over to Stiles and unzipping the backpack.  He had a couple of Reese’s cups in his hands.

 

“What are you doing?” Stiles asked.

 

“They’re your favorite, so I got them for you,” Derek said quietly.

 

“Oh.  Okay,” Stiles said disinterestedly.  This was going to be way too fun.  Stiles officially decided that both he and Derek were going to hell.

 

Before Derek, could say anything more, Scott got everyone’s attention.

 

“Ok, I think that’s everything. Let’s move out!” he said. Everyone moved towards the door.

 

“Do you want me to carry the backpack?” Derek asked Stiles following close behind him.

 

“No.  And why are you being so nice all of a sudden?” Stiles asked, pretending to know nothing. Derek turned pink.

 

“I…I just…” Derek broke off in a mumble. Stiles raised his eyebrows, but Derek refused to say anything else.  Stiles let out a huff and caught up with Lydia, who smirked at him.

 

“Hopefully things will go smoothly today,” she said lazily.  Stiles knew she wasn’t just referring to their little witch-hunt.

 

*   *   *

 

They finally got to the burned Hale mansion around 9:30.  Stiles slowly slid out of his Jeep, his bat in hand.  He couldn’t deny that he was a little nervous…this witch was crazier and eviler than the others.  Derek and Malia pulled up behind him in Derek’s sleek Camaro.  Derek ran into the woods, mostly likely to shift into a full wolf. It was interesting to Stiles that he could choose to shift into a full wolf or just a partial one. He emerged from the trees a minute later as a giant black wolf and looked in Stiles’ direction. His tail swished when he realized Stiles was staring.  Crap. Stiles looked away, searching for his bat. Then he quickly rejoined the rest of the group.

 

“Ok,” Scott said quietly, “If she’s here she probably already knows that we are too.  We have to be alert, and stay together.  There’s no need to split up for this.”

 

No one said anything in response. Scott looked at them all one last time and turned around to lead them up the porch steps.  Stiles walked next to Lydia and Derek trotted over to stand on Stiles’ other side.  Stiles rolled his eyes dramatically.  Scott pushed the door open when they reached it and they all filed inside.  The witch was waiting for them at the top of the stairs. Apparently, she found it futile to try and hide from a pack of werewolves.

 

“Ahhh,” she croaked, “You’ve brought…the one…with the damaged _heart_.”

 

Derek growled low next to Stiles. It sounded feral and harsh, and it sent shivers down Stiles’ spine.  Or maybe it was just the witch’s obsession with hearts that made him feel uncomfortable.  She slowly started to walk down the stairs towards them.  Without warning, a bright light emanated from the pendant around her neck.  Stiles heard Derek whine and the next thing knew, Derek was a very naked human being on the floor. He writhed in what looked like pain.

 

“What are you doing to him?!  Stop!” Stiles yelled.

 

“Intensifying…spell,” the witch wheezed, “He will relive…his deepest regrets…only worse.  Such as…killing the girl he loved…and breaking your _heart,_ pure one.”

 

Stiles knelt down in front of Derek, who looked up at him with agonized, tear-filled eyes.  Stiles was really trying to ignore his nakedness, honestly.

 

“You’ll never…be worthy…of one so pure, foolish wolf,” the witch said, cackling.  Derek was sobbing at this point.  Scott let out a growl and charged the witch.  She screeched, a fowl sound that made Stiles cover his ears.  He looked around and noticed that the only person who didn’t seem to be affected by it was Lydia.  Figures, he thought.  Scott barreled right through it, though, and rammed right into the witch.  There was a tearing sound as her head became detached from her body, and the screaming bubbled down to nothing.  Stiles tentatively let go of his ears and looked down at Derek. Tears were still flowing down his face like little rivers.

 

“I’m sorry, Stiles,” Derek gasped, “I’m so sorry for what I did to you.  She was right; I can’t ever deserve you.  I can’t ever make up for it.”

 

Stiles looked down at Derek with sad eyes. “Please try, Derek. Try to deserve me.”

 

With that, he got to his feet and left the house before he said anything stupid.  He passed Scott on his way out who was wiping black witch’s blood from his mouth. Lydia gave him an encouraging smile right before he broke out of the dark house and his even darker thoughts.

 

*   *   *

 

Malia had fetched Derek’s clothes for him in the woods, and Lydia had come out to Stiles’ Jeep and climbed into the passenger seat. As soon as she was buckled, Stiles started the engine and took off, not super anxious to see Derek again in this place.  They drove in silence to the loft and waited for everyone else there.  Derek walked in, avoiding Stiles eyes.  Stiles noticed that his were still red and puffy.  Scott quickly debriefed the operation and gave a couple of tips to Liam on shifting.  After they were dismissed, Stiles went to grab his backpack only to find it wasn’t where he had left it.  He found it in the kitchen where Derek was adding to the Reese’s stash.  He couldn’t help the little laugh that escaped his lips.

 

“As much as I love those, it’s gonna take a lot more than chocolate buddy,” Stiles said with a small smirk.

 

“I’ve got a few other tricks up my sleeve,” Derek said without any real humor. 

 

“Hmmmm, can’t wait to see what they are,” Stiles said, snatching a Reese’s out of Derek’s hand.  He opened the wrapper and popped the whole thing in his mouth before grabbing his backpack and heading out, leaving Derek in the kitchen with an empty wrapper.

 

_“We are broken, we can’t fix it_

_there’s no cure for our condition._

_Desperate eyes are staring at me_

_Should be hopeless but we’re happy._

_It’s not perfect here between us_

_Even angels have their demons._

_Trapped inside this twisted circle_

_It ain’t right but it’s eternal.”_

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you liked it!


	8. Empty Handed

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Derek and Stiles finally have a very important conversation.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ok, friends, this is it! I hope this lives up to your expectations. The story is almost done! One more chapter to go, and it will include some fun little sexy times for our boys. ;) Just get through this one first. Enjoy!

CHAPTER 8: EMPTY HANDED

 

Stiles could honestly say that his life had taken an interesting turn.  He went from being tormented by Derek to being pampered by him.  Derek did whatever he asked him to do and more. Stiles once complained about the dishes that were waiting for him in the sink back home after a particularly long pack meeting and Derek literally went home with Stiles to do the dishes. Once the task was done, however, he didn’t stay long.  It seemed like Derek felt uncomfortable to spend down time with Stiles until he was given permission to do so.  That kind of made Stiles smile to himself.  He had Derek walking on eggshells, and it was a good feeling to be in control of the situation finally. However, Stiles admitted to himself that the thing he wanted most was not necessarily control but just love and equality in their relationship.  Right now he was just waiting for the perfect moment to tell Derek that he would finally let him back in.

 

“Sooo….” Scott said one day, “I can practically smell the anxiety on Derek whenever he’s around you.  Are you planning on letting him off the hook anytime soon?”

 

Stiles huffed out a laugh.  “Yeah, I just need him to let me in all the way.”

 

“What do you mean?” Scott asked.

 

“I mean that I feel like there are still some things that he’s keeping from me,” Stiles said, shrugging his shoulders, “I want the whole story.  I want to know everything that has caused this whole thing.  He needs to let me in before I let him back in.”

 

Lydia was observing their conversation from Derek’s couch.  Derek had gone out to get some pizza on Scott’s request, so Scott had taken advantage of his absence to talk to Stiles.

 

Lydia opened her mouth as if to say something, but quickly closed it as Derek opened the door with 5 boxes of pizza balancing carefully in his arms.

 

“Oh thank God, I was starving!” Scott practically shouted.

 

Derek came over to where everyone was sitting and placed the boxes on his coffee table.

 

“These two are cheese, veggie lover for Lydia, meat lover for Scott and Liam, and then just pepperoni for Stiles,” Derek said.

 

“Did you ask them to put onions on it though?” Stiles asked.  Derek’s face immediately fell.

 

“I…I didn’t hear you ask for that…” Derek said sounding miserable.

 

“No no, it’s ok,” Stiles said quickly, but it was too late.  Derek walked into the kitchen without a backward glance.  Stiles sighed and got up to follow him.  He found Derek grabbing an onion and proceeding to cut it up.

 

“Derek,” Stiles said, breathing out a small laugh, “You really don’t have to cut up an onion for me, that’s silly.”

 

“You wanted it, and I failed to get it for you,” Derek said roughly, “So I’m fixing it.”

 

Derek, please stop,” Stiles said, moving and gently placing his hand on top of Derek’s, which was currently cutting the onion. Derek froze immediately at the contact. Stiles looked up and could see tears starting to well up in his eyes.  He turned his head away as if to hide it.

 

“Why are you crying?” Stiles asked, taking a hold of Derek’s chin and pulling his face towards him so that he could look in his eyes. A single tear fell from a perfect green eye.

 

“Because I have nothing to offer you,” Derek said. He sounded broken. “You remind me so much of Paige…so innocent and perfect.”

 

Stiles’ eyes widened.  Oh.  So that was it. He quickly recalled the story of how Derek had to kill his own girlfriend to save her from an even more painful death.

 

“Derek, I…I don’t know what to say,” Stiles said quietly.

 

“You don’t have to say anything,” Derek said, “Everyone that I have ever loved has ended up dead, and I don’t want you to die because of me.  I don’t want you to die _for_ me either. That’s why I got so upset when you said that the other week.”

 

Stiles smiled a sad smile.  “I’m sure you could have found a better way to communicate that besides getting all up in my face, Derek.”

 

“Nothing else would have kept you away from me,” Derek whispered, “I needed you to hate me, even though I absolutely dreaded the thought of it.”

 

“Well…I’ve never actually hated you a day in my life,” Stiles said, “Even if I said the words.”

 

“It doesn’t matter anyway,” Derek said, “I have nothing real I can give you.  Everything I’ve given you so far has been material and fleeting.  It doesn’t last.”

 

Stiles stood in silence for a few seconds, thinking everything over.  After cranking wheels in his head, he finally decided on what he wanted to say.

 

“So, why the sudden change in your plans to get me to hate you?” he asked.

 

“Because,” Derek whispered, “I couldn’t live without you anymore.”

 

“Yes, but why, Derek?  Why can’t you live without me?” Stiles asked, practically begging him to say it.

 

“Because I love you,” Derek said, “I love you more than anything on this planet.”

 

“And that’s all I need,” Stiles said. He closed the distance between himself and Derek and placed his hands on either side of Derek’s face. Derek’s eyes widened slightly and he gulped noisily.  Stiles watched his Adam’s apple bob up and down with interest. 

 

“Do you promise to never leave me again, no matter how much you think it’s the right thing?” Stiles asked, his eyes boring into Derek’s.

 

“Yes,” Derek breathed out.  His voice was shaky.

 

“Because here’s the thing Derek – living without you would hurt me more than the worst possible death,” Stiles said.

 

And with that he pressed his lips to Derek’s, which essentially caused fireworks to explode all around them. It took Stiles a few minutes of kissing Derek to realize that it was actually the pack cheering at the sight of them.

 

_“If I came to you empty handed,_

_A barren ocean with nothing at all,_

_And if I came to you empty hearted,_

_Searching for pieces after the fall…_

_Would you show me what love is_

_If I had nothing to give?”_

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks as always for reading! <3


	9. You're Mine

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Stiles takes care of one more problem. ;)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here it is friends, the final chapter! I hope it is satisfying and that you enjoy it! I certainly enjoyed writing this story, so thanks for sticking with it! :D

CHAPTER 9: YOU’RE MINE

 

Stiles was waiting anxiously for Derek at his house. His dad had left for work already and was working the night shift so they had the place to themselves. Stiles couldn’t deny that he was a little nervous…he had big plans for tonight, whether Derek knew about them or not. He practically jumped out of his skin when he heard the Camaro pull up his driveway.  When he heard the doorbell ring, he ran to the door and pulled it open.  Derek stood on the doorstep looking incredibly sexy in skin-tight blue jeans and a dark gray Henley. He had his keys in one hand and a bouquet of flowers in the other.

 

“Hi there,” Stiles said, smiling. Derek smiled back nervously.

 

“Hi.  I got you flowers,” he said shyly.

 

“Well, that was sweet of you,” Stiles said, taking them and kissing Derek on the cheek.  That only made Derek’s smile widen as if to say ‘ok he kinda likes me.’

 

“Come one in!” Stiles said, leading Derek into the kitchen where he found an empty vase on the windowsill to put the flowers in. He carefully filled it halfway with water and then placed them on the table.

 

“So, what do you want to do tonight?” Derek asked. Stiles could hear the curiosity in his voice.

 

“I was thinking we could start with dinner,” Stiles said winking.  He pulled out freshly made lasagna from the oven and placed it on the table. Derek’s eyes widened.

 

“Wow, Stiles, that looks amazing. Did you make it yourself?” Derek asked. Stiles rolled his eyes.

 

“Of course I did!  Do you think my dad ever cooks?” Stiles said in response. Derek turned a shade of pink and didn’t say anything.  Stiles sighed loudly.

 

“Derek, I don’t want you to feel like you are walking on eggshells here.  I told you that I forgive you, so we can joke about things like normal people,” Stiles said reassuringly.

 

“Ok, sorry,” Derek said breathing out a laugh, “I just don’t want to mess this up…again.”

 

“Well you won’t as long as you’re not an asshole,” Stiles said. Derek gave him a tame version of his characteristic glare.  Stiles just laughed.

 

“There we go, that’s better!” he said smiling widely. Derek couldn’t help but smile in return.

 

Their dinner was fantastic and they spent the entirety of it talking and laughing.  It felt so casual and nice that Stiles had to pinch his leg under the table to make sure that he wasn’t dreaming.  When they finished eating, Derek cleared the table, insisting that Stiles stay sitting, and then he even did the dishes. 

 

“I was thinking you could eat me for dessert,” Stiles said casually, causing Derek to drop the plate he was rinsing, resulting in his Henley getting soaked in the front.  He quickly turned around to look at Stiles with a wide-eyed expression. Stiles let out a laugh and stood up to walk over to him.

 

“Hmmm, now that won’t do,” he muttered in a low voice, running his hand over Derek’s wet shirt, “Wet clothes are _so_ uncomfortable.  Luckily, I have a solution.”

 

“Oh?” Derek said, gulping.  Stiles just grinned a wicked grin and took Derek by the hand. He led him upstairs to his bedroom and shut the door behind him.

 

“Stiles…I know I denied you of this when you turned 18, but you don’t have to do this if you’re not ready,” Derek said. His voice had gone a little hoarse.

 

“Oh, don’t worry Derek.  I am _completely_ prepared for this.  And I’ve wanted it for a long time,” Stiles said.  His heart was beating rapidly in his chest.  He hadn’t been able to think of anything but Derek since he met him, and he knew what he wanted.  What he had wanted since first laying his eyes on him in the Preserve. 

 

“I will give you whatever you want,” Derek said seriously, “I’ll do whatever you want me to.”

 

“Mmmm, perfect,” Stiles said humming, “Because I have a very clear vision of what I want to do tonight.  You can probably start by losing your clothes.”

 

Derek immediately obeyed.  He first removed his soaked Henley.  Stiles drank in his muscular chest and abs, totally mesmerized by how the muscles flexed and relaxed as Derek brought the shirt over his head.

 

“Fuck, Derek, you’re so beautiful,” Stiles said, causing Derek to turn bright pink.  Derek kicked off his shoes and socks and then proceeded to slide his pants and underwear down in one go.  As his thick cock bounced out, it was no secret that he was extremely excited and looking forward to this as much as Stiles was. 

 

“Wow,” Stiles said, walking up to Derek and taking his cock in his hand.  Derek shuddered under his touch.

 

“You’re so hard already, Der.”

 

“I’ve never loved someone as much as you,” Derek said, “You do crazy things to me.”

 

“I love you too.  So much,” Stiles said, standing on his tiptoes to kiss Derek on the lips. When he broke away, he quickly removed his own shirt and pants, but he kept his underwear on for now: no one had ever seen him fully naked before, and he was still a little nervous.

 

“So, um…I kind of wanted to do something fun,” Stiles said slowly.

 

“Whatever you want, baby,” Derek said. Stiles turned and walked over to his dresser, pulling out a bottle of lube and a thin rope.  He didn’t bother getting condoms, knowing that werewolves couldn’t carry diseases.  When he turned around, Derek grinned when he saw what was in his hand.

 

“Hmmm, I’m liking this already,” Derek said, smirking.

 

“Lay down on the bed,” Stiles said, to which Derek quickly complied.  Stiles climbed on top of him, straddling his crotch.  He could hear Derek’s breathing increase in speed, and he felt Derek’s cock move by itself, which for the record was super hot.  Stiles took Derek’s hands and brought them together above his head. Then he tied them together, not too tight so that it hurt him but tight enough so that they wouldn’t get loose. All the while, Derek had an innocent look in his eyes but a devious smirk on his lips.  Stiles sat upright to admire his handiwork. He could feel himself getting hard inside of his underwear just looking at Derek like this, completely under his control.  He experimentally grinded his clothed ass against Derek’s cock beneath him, causing the older man to gasp.

 

“Stiles…” he whispered.

 

“That feel good, big guy?” Stiles asked grinning.

 

“Yes,” Derek responded simply, his voice shaking. Stiles then stood up off the bed, making Derek whine from the lack of contact.  He slid his underwear down slowly, watching Derek’s face the whole time. When his cock finally bounced out, Derek couldn’t take his eyes off him.

 

“Shit Stiles.  You’re absolutely perfect,” Derek whispered in awe.

 

“If you say so,” Stiles muttered climbing on top of him again.

 

“I do,” Derek growled.  Stiles smiled and pressed his lips to Derek’s.

 

“Let’s take a look at this beautiful specimen, shall we?” Stiles said, taking a hold of Derek’s cock.  He played with it for while, pulling on it and making it bounce back, smacking Derek in the stomach.  He could see sweat starting to build up on Derek’s abs and forehead, which only made his cock start to leak precum.  He wiped it off with his thumb and then held it up to Derek’s mouth.

 

“Wanna taste?” he asked.  Derek opened his mouth and licked it clean off Stiles’ thumb.

 

“Mmmmm perfect,” Derek said.  Stiles grinned.  He then grabbed the lube and poured a generous amount into his palm. He grabbed Derek’s dick again and started stroking it, making it nice and slick.

 

“I prepared myself earlier,” Stiles said, winking, “So I’m totally ready for you.” 

 

Derek just looked at him like he couldn’t believe what was in front of his eyes.  It gave Stiles butterflies in his stomach.  When Derek’s cock was nice and slippery, Stiles aligned it with his hole and slowly sat down.  It felt a little painful at first, but he found himself craving more and more until he was sitting all the way down on it.  Derek let out the most beautiful sound that Stiles had ever heard.  Stiles slowly started to move up and down on Derek’s cock but gradually started to pick up the pace.

 

“Stiles,” Derek whispered his name.

 

“C’mon Derek, louder.  Say my name louder.  After everything that’s happened I want people to hear you scream my name,” Stiles said.

 

“Fuck Stiles!”  Derek yelled out.  Stiles moaned and rode him faster until he felt Derek shoot his load into his ass, yelling out Stiles’ name the whole time.  Stiles smiled down at Derek as he lifted himself off of him.  Derek smiled back, his face pink and his breathing heavy. Stiles then turned his attention to his own cock, which was throbbing with anticipation.

 

“Can I…Can I touch..?” Derek asked shyly.

 

“Be my guest,” Stiles said, reaching up and untying his hands, “You were such a good wolf after all.”

 

As soon as his hands were free, Derek used them to explore all over Stiles’ body.  Stiles relished in the feeling of being touched by someone for the first time. Derek let out a moan when he grabbed Stiles’ fleshy ass, and then he brought his hands down to Stiles’ dick. It was a feeling like none that Stiles had experienced.  Derek was apparently an expert at using his hands because Stiles came all over Derek’s abs within seconds.  Stiles collapsed next to him and kissed him gently on the lips.

 

“That was amazing,” Stiles said, “Thank you.”

 

“Anything for you, beautiful. I don’t deserve you. You are just too perfect,” Derek said.

 

Stiles laughed.  “Maybe you don’t, but I love you and never want to be without you. You’re mine forever.”

 

“Yes, I’m yours forever,” Derek said, “For as long as you want me.”

 

“I’ll always want you,” Stiles said, tilting his head to kiss Derek once more on his lips.

 

_“You were insecure, but I was so sure_

_That I wanted you…_

_Then you said those three words that I’ve been waiting for._

_You became a part of me._

_You’re mine for life.”_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please let me know what you think!

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading!


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